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Even though I was a Christian..I was as lukewarm as a leftover glass of yesterdays iced tea still sitting on the coffee table from the previous evening. Melted ice…diluted flavor…dingy glass…bent straw…wilted lemon slice. There was no way that an unbeliever would know that I believed in Jesus Christ. If I was standing in front of a judge would there be enough evidence in my life to convict me of Christianity? NO, sorry lady… you do not have a shred of evidence, no proof whatsoever. This verdict would have been correct.

Then one day I picked up a paperback book on prophecy in a garage sale.  It was fascinating. I had never read anything before about prophecy and no teacher had ever taught Revelations when i was in Sunday School and I don’t ever remember a sermon about the end times. 

This was the first time I had read about the rapture. Reading this material caused at first immense interest. Then the conviction started. Weight upon weight began piling into my heart until no longer could i hold inside the tears of 30 years of unconfessed sin. Down onto floor…this is where i stayed for hours..on my knees..on my back..crosslegged…in prayer, begging forgiveness for the time I had spent idly wandering this shameful world. I had been hit with a powerful realization that my indifference to sin and the Lord Jesus Christ would result in being doomed in the upcoming wrath and judgment.

I rededicated my life to Christ that afternoon. This single episode has been the most significant life-changing event of my life.  I had accepted Christ as a young girl and have always been a believer but the conviction of my guilt shook me to my very core and caused true repentance.

What happened next was a hunger and thirst for God and the Word. I had never experienced this before in my life.  Because I was expressing this hunger for the Word of God, someone invited me to Bible Study Fellowship which is an intense study which will put you into the Word of God daily. Then the time came  for next step. I asked the Lord to expose my sin to me and further convict me of areas in my life that needed to be changed. This was another milestone and yet another corner turned.  If you ever want a fast answer to prayer……ask this:

Psalms 139:23-24  Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

Opening your life to the Lord in this way is cleansing and He needs clean vessels for his servants.  

I try to keep myself low, humble.  I am nothing, I am a nobody.  All that I am is what the Lord has done in me, I am nothing in myself.  When I bow down before Him it is in total submission. The Holy Spirit then can do His work and can use me as a vessel.  Everything in my life has to be done His way, in His time, for His Glory and for His purposes only.

We need to confess and repent of our sin constantly.   I believe everyone knows what it is to confess of something, but that they do not really know what repentance truly is. To repent is to turn away from sin. To repent causes a changed reformed life.  If your life has not seriously changed since becoming a Christian then you need to take a good look at your walk with the Lord.

In Revelation 3 the church of Laodicea is admonished.

Rev 3:16 So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.

Rev 3:19 As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.

I will never in my lifetime be able to express the gratitude I have that the Lord loved me enough to rebuke and chasten me and therefore caused me to repent and change my ways so that I could truly be his servant. Is the life of a servant easy? Not always…but there is nothing more empowering than lowering and humbling yourself before the Lord.

What about you? Is the Lord rebuking and chastening your heart this very moment?  Would you please listen for his voice, read his Word, and completely turn your life over to Him?


May 2023



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